he asked me to take a “leap of faith”

he promised me everything. he promised me love, care, commitment, respect, trust, honesty, everything. for forever. and he promised it would only be for me.

I want to believe him but I don’t. Not right now, anyway.

Right now, I need to figure out what this is worth and if it’s worth rebuilding after the earthquake.

He needs to figure out if he truly can deliver on what he is saying. I’m not sure he can. Behaviors take time to change, do I have the patience?

He said despite what happens, this will be a huge learning experience for him. At least I can have peace of mind he won’t put another girl through this shit.


One thought on “pos

  1. singlicated :P says:

    hi moon child!

    what’s pos (po’s? piece of sh*t?)?? anyway, just leaving a note to say i’m cheering for you!! i know that this has to be your decision that happens on your timeline and in your own way, but hope you know i’m here to support you however i can–and stalking you here, as always. when you first shared, i felt this overwhelming need to protect you, and i think that may have come off too judgmental. you know yourself and him and the situation best!
    your situation is completely different from mine, but i don’t know why it makes me think a lot about the summer when i felt betrayed too. i wrote countless notes to him that nobody ever saw to try to process everything. i kept trying to figure out the right thing to do. i wanted to punish him and would make little rules in my head about how or when i talked to him, but eventually i sort of felt like i was punishing myself, if anything.
    so just wanted to say, i hope you don’t punish yourself at all. because none of this is your fault (i always felt mine was a hint of karma). and i’m always here to listen.



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